Gary’s Last Dance. Dancing with the Stars S21:E5

Time to dance! Tonight, on Dancing with the Stars, the theme is Most Memorable Year—AKA the week Laura cries through an entire box of tissues. I’m a sap, so sue me.

Dancing with the Stars logo

Paige and I couldn’t get together tonight, so I’m posting here and she’s live tweeting (because she’s funnier than me). Also noteworthy: Alfonso Ribeiro is filling in for Tom. Keep reading for my ranking and recap of the night’s dances.

1. Bindi & Derek
Routine: Contemporary to “Every Breath You Take”
Score: 28
Wow. Major water works for me on that one. I cried through the whole package and the dance. Still sobbing as I type this. So beautiful and moving. Nothing else to say.

2. Nick & Sharna
Routine: Jazz to “Everybody (Backstreet’s Back)”
Score: 27
You’d think Nick might be tired of dancing to that song, but I guess not. haha As a girl who grew up in the 90s, the album with “Everybody (Backstreet’s Back)” was actually the first boy band CD I ever owned. #memories Obviously, I’ve gotta say I loved this dance.

3. Tamar & Val
Routine: Rumba to “King”
Score: 27
Absolutely gorgeous dress and absolutely gorgeous dance. Although the dance had meaning and it was conveyed well, I still feel the chemistry between the pair is missing. Tamar is just weirdly stoic when she dances.

4. Hayes & Emma
Routine: Contemporary to “Stitches”
Score: 27
Definitely Hayes’s best dance yet. He could still stand to loosen up slightly; however, it was still an absolutely huge improvement from the previous weeks. I’m way too old for Hayes, but I totally see why all the teens love him. He’s adorable.

5. Carlos & Witney
Routine: Waltz to “Amazing Grace”
Score: 25
Carlos definitely does better with the upbeat, character dances, but I love how he always dances with passion and emotion. He and Alexa just seem like really sweet, down-to-earth people, so I can’t help but want them to do well.

6. Alexa & Mark
Routine: Foxtrot to “Mama Said”
Score: 21
I thought it was strong until the end when something went obviously wrong. Alexa seems really humble and family oriented, though, and I like it. She’s such a perfectionist, so I always feel so bummed for her when she messes up and beats herself up over it.

7. Alek & Lindsay
Routine: Paso Doble to “Wake Me Up”
Score: 24
Rightfully so, he had a tough time getting through his practices and the dance because last week’s shooting in Oregon was at his college. For everything he went through, he did a pretty commendable job.

8. Andy & Allison
Routine: Cha Cha to “Good to Be Alive”
Score: 23
He’s really got to work on sharpening and quickening his footwork. I like that he always seems really into his dances, though. I also really liked hearing the story behind his song “Keep Your Head Up,” which I love. And omg, an Allison and tWitch baby on the way! That kid better be an amazing dancer!

9. Paula & Louis
Routine: Cha Cha to “RESPECT”
Score: 18
Yikes. Slow motion and complete lack of balance. I know she wanted a comeback, but it just wasn’t happening this week. Paula’s really giving Gary a run for his money for the “Most Awkward and Uncomfortable Red Room Interviewee” award.

10. Gary & Anna
Routine: Jazz to “That’ll Be the Day”
Score: 16
Anna is a brave soul for dropping back and trusting he’d catch her. This was pretty standard Gary—lots of heart and lots of terrible dancing.

Shockingly, Carlos & Witney were in danger, but it was Gary who got sent home—not so shockingly. No one is breathing a bigger sigh of relief than Erin Andrews, knowing that she doesn’t have to interview him anymore.

If Paula isn’t the next one out, I’m going to get really, really angry. She is far and away the worst one left. Tell me you agree in the comments.

Until the next commercial break,